I have fought my career for almost five years. I have fought wanting to be at home, raising kids instead of being at school spending time with other people's kids. Some days have been easier, and some days have been more difficult. The education system has certainly not made my fight any easier in its favor with its overemphasis on testing and increasing the rigor in arbitrary ways. Over the past couple of years, I have tried to love my career, but it is difficult. This is mostly because it is a career and not my whole life, which it seems to be with most teachers.
Today's sermon was on the parable of the talents, and I will not go into the individual details of it. The part of the sermon that struck me the most was the simple fact that one servant received five talents and another received two. They did not compare their inheritance with one another, and neither did they even give themselves thought before they went about glorifying their master with it. All of the sudden, my years of fighting with my circumstances felt immature, futile and, to be honest, sinful.
According to J.C. Ryle, a talent is anything that can be used to the glory of God. Looking at my life, I have more "talents" than I can even name: my intellect, influence, experiences, strength, talents and gifts, not to mention my husband and children or our home and supportive parents. Today, for the first time, really, I was forced to look at my circumstances as not something that had been forced upon me against my will. Instead, these are things that Lord has given me, entrusted me with. What I do with them will show my faith and diligence. That has a way of changing one's perspective, especially when doing nothing with my talents shows hatred and disregard for the Master Himself.
This sermon solidified in me a decision that I've been turning over in my mind for a couple of weeks. I am going to get my Master's in English. For anyone but an English teacher, this would be a throwaway program to pursue, but this would offer me more flexibility in both my current school and maybe in future opportunities. I am excited about the possibilities and the opportunities, and I am excited about more than that. For the first time in almost five years, I am having to commit to my career. I am not going to be allowed to get out of it while this is going on, and that is a refreshing thought to my soul that has been searching frantically for a way out. I will be expanding my talents in this endeavor, and though I know that the chance for idolatry is there, there is much more opportunity for God's glory than my own.
Thanks be to our God. Soli Deo Gloria, y'all.